Dear NBC,

Why oh why do you ruin my evening by showing re-runs of my favorite TV show "ER" right smack in the middle of the current season? I can't tell you how much this annoys me and ruins not only my enjoyment of the show but dare I say my whole Thursday evening. I rushed home last night from a moderately interesting dinner with half a bottle of wine left a-wasting on the table, only to see an episode that was first screened last October or thereabouts wherein Abby gives birth and the child is perilously close to dying. Now I know FULL WELL that the child has recovered, given that the child is now shall we say at least 5 months old in TV months and doing quite well thank you very much. What possible good is there in watching this episode again, especially out of context with the previous weeks offering? If you must screen reruns, at least have the decency to show them in order, not sticking them in randomly in the middle of the new season. I was forced to channel surf in response and ended up watching English blokes living with the Kombai tribe of New Guinea. Not the perfect way to end my Thursday. Watch out NBC! You're on my sh*t list!

-Fiona

Dear God,

Listen Lord. If you are going to continue to talk to a mortal here on earth, I would urge you to consider someone other than Pat Robertson.....please!!!! I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but he has kind of a big mouth. I’m sure when you told him about the impending doom due at the end of 2007 that it was something you told him in deepest confidence. Well…guess what? He told EVERYONE!

Now a lot of people who listen to Pat Robertson are really nervous. My feeling is, if you were to share you feelings or thoughts, please tell someone who doesn’t have the common sense of a 16 year old gossip queen. (Also I may add, you should totally hate him now and feel free to tell everyone what Pat did with the football team after the pep rally last Friday behind the gym mats, he's a total slut!)

Also, while you are at it, make McDonald’s food healthy and go ahead and give me just a little more penal girth.

Amen,

Dennis

Dear Douchebag,

You lived in my appartment for 3 months,but it seemed way longer than that.your constantly braying on your cellphone sounded like a jackass who got its nuts stepped on,and you ate every goddamn thing in site without having courtesy to ask or replace anything,when you started asking for shit is when i drew the line. I was still nice and willing to work things out until you called the police on my appartment,saying we were holding your stuff wrongly when you knew full well you owed me a lot and agreed to me holding on to your shit when i talked with you.you went into court after i sued your ass(and after you said you didnt owe me anything)with your fat bitch lying girlfriend and the judge saw right through that.(you also agreed to take care of the neighbors cat,which i never said was ok and got stuck taking care of when you decided you didnt want to do it anymore)then after the fact you claimed you took complete care of it the whole time,where if you would have had your way the
cat would have ran away.long story short,you are a douchebag,John wayne Jackson.you are a complete piece of shit,completely worthless and nothing but a user.its been over a year and im still waiting for my money you owe me,which isnt nearly enough.i should have just said fuck you from the begining and kept your money,or just sold your shit instead of telling you,and that way i could have gotten what i am owed.not like you would have taken care of any of it.you are a worthless piece of shit and i hope all the other people you hang out with learn what a worthless loser you are.by the way,your word as a man is worth shit,and you are a bitch

From,
Anonymous